Episode Transcript
[00:00:00] Speaker A: What up, what up? What up? Welcome back to the Bad podcast. Brad and Dwayne, we in here. Another episode. Brad, man, what we talking about today, brother?
[00:00:09] Speaker B: Hopelessness doesn't always feel or look like hopelessness. And we are going to make a difference in this podcast.
[00:00:17] Speaker A: In this one.
[00:00:18] Speaker B: Yes, sir.
[00:00:19] Speaker A: All right, let's get it.
[00:00:23] Speaker B: Are you ready? Are you ready?
[00:00:39] Speaker A: What it looked like, would it be like, what it do? Back in here, another episode of the Bad podcast. Brad and Dwayne, my man. Brad is the B, I am the D, and the. And is the A. So if you didn't know, we are here, man. Always excited to get behind the microphone and drop episodes. And Brad told me before we hit record, man, we're going in a little different direction, but I got a feeling, right, because it's in us, man. It's always gonna be. It's gonna loop back to fitness some kind of way. But, you know, we're gonna, we're gonna talk about it, man. But what you got going on?
[00:01:13] Speaker B: Yeah, you know, I, We. We will loop back into fitness for sure. We always like to take steering to the left and to the right, but so I actually want to kick. Kick this thing off with kind of a sad story. So a couple, A couple weeks ago, now that this will drop, I had a former student take his life. And, And I hate to start a podcast like that, but, you know, like I said right from the, from the get go, sometimes we can't see hopelessness. We can't see sadness. And that's why we got to start seeing people and understanding people and just checking in on our people. This guy, he was Mr. Motivation. He was Mr. Uplifting. He was Mr. Good Vibes and high energy and somebody that, like, he looked at. He. I mean, he was very much like me, just like high energy and just always like, go, go, go. And, yeah, he took his life and, you know, so I was kind of looking into his case and looking into, you know, what had happened. And one of the things that popped up on my news feed, you know, social media is it's like if you're looking at something, they will, like, flood your feed with whatever that algorithm says that you're looking into.
Yeah, especially Instagram. Like, if you look at one ad, it's like, game over.
And a statistic had popped up on my newsfeed. 40% of people in the world are walking around with a sense of hopelessness and sadness. That's almost half the world.
That's. That's a lot of people, you know, billions of People walking around with sadness and hopelessness, and you look at somebody and, you know, guys, it doesn't take much to just smile at somebody, hold the door for somebody, buy somebody a coffee, give them a fist bump, high five.
And we will tie this into fitness here shortly. But this is just something that's been heavy on my heart lately, and I want to do a good job at relaying the message that we can do good and we can create everlasting change and positive change just by a kind gesture of a fist bump, a high five. Hey, how you doing? Holding the door. And like I said, I hate to kick it off with a little melancholy taste in our mouths, but I think this is really important to talk about coming off of September, Suicide prevention Month. And, you know, now that we're in October, people kind of put that on the back burner, like, well, that was suicide prevention month, like, but now we're in October, and I don't know why we disregard those kind of things, but, you know, it's highlighted certain months and not others, and I think this should be talked about and thought about 365 days a year.
[00:03:39] Speaker A: No, absolutely.
For real. Because, you know, you just never know what people going through, man.
It may look like something on the outside, but you never know what is actually going on on the inside. And, you know, I remember when you mentioned, like, just being kind to people.
This was early. Early social media days. The guy that had, like, the do you need a hug? Shirt, you know?
[00:04:06] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:04:07] Speaker A: And. And, you know, so many people needed hugs, man. They. You know, they needed hugs, they needed touch. They felt lonely. But if you just saw them in passing, he was like, oh, that person got it together. That's the businessman, you know, that's the businesswoman, you know, and you just never know what people are going through. And I even think back to, you know, one of my favorite artists, Forest Frank, he was doing, like, you know, if you. If you're not having a good day, have a seat. And he would sing his song, I'm gonna have a good day. And, like, people would need to feel that. And that's actually how he blew up. But it just.
The. The biggest thing that I. I kind of take away for that, man, is, you know, you. You never know what people are going through. Even in your own house.
Even in your own house, man. I mean, you know, we talk about in the street and all around, but, you know, you got to check on your people in your house, man. I mean, even if it's you, you know, if it's you that's feeling like that because 40 is a huge percentage, you know, that's a huge percentage. And so if you, if you're feeling like that, man, you know, talk to somebody and reach out and you know, and that's the hardest part, you know, because the biggest thing about, you know, feeling like that is you isolate yourself. It's a, it's a, it's a natural response is to isolate, you know, and that, and I know men, we do that the best. We, we are the kings of isolation and, and being able to find, you know, a group or a friend that you can rely on, man. So I think this is a very important topic no matter what month it is.
Because even if you don't take it to the extreme of, you know, ending your own life, just living in that state is not healthy for sure.
[00:05:40] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah, you're spot on with the isolation thing. A lot of men think that strength is pretending that everything's okay. And I think strength is actually admitting that maybe something is going on or you do have some flaws or you do have some things to work on. And instead of going into a dark room and just separating yourself from other people, man, get around like minded people, get around positive people, get around people that will empower you and uplift you. And that's, you know, this could be kind of like our segue, you know, in, in the sense of how you related into fitness. Because we have the accountability piece. And so one of my, one of my good friends, Rich Norton, he is like my right hand man up here in Western New York. He helps me with a lot of things and he. Rich, yeah boy Rich.
He talks religiously about our accountability piece with the app. He said it was a game changer in the sense of just holding each other accountable. But a step further, like these people have become friends. And a couple of the friends that he's made, they, they did had some have some dark times in their lives and now they're starting to lean on each other, they're starting to rely on each other, like, hey, I'm having a bad day. Can you lift me up right? And you know, and, and one, one thing he told me the other day is like, you know, you can't make a permanent decision on a temporary storm. And a lot of do make these massive decisions and, and we take these massive, these massive actions because of a temporary feeling or a temporary emotion, and we make these permanent decisions that could impact a lot of people in a good way or a bad way. And that was one of the Things that he had mentioned to me is the accountability piece with our app and how strong it is and how much it has bonded these people that don't really necessarily know each other, they just know each other through the app. In the fitness space.
Our fitness is just so much more than just fitness. It is, it is a family man. We are tight knit. We know a lot of our clients personally. Our clients know each other personally and they're, they're talking behind the scenes. I, Somebody told me there's like 900 accountability groups or something along those lines. I don't know, accurate stat or not. Somebody told me that.
[00:07:53] Speaker A: In the app or just in general?
[00:07:55] Speaker B: Yeah, in the app.
I don't know if you can track that or not.
Somebody, I can't remember who told me that, but they probably.
[00:08:02] Speaker A: It might be because I know we have the ranking now and so. Yeah, that might be where they saw it.
[00:08:07] Speaker B: Yeah, well, that's what he, that I think it was Rich that might have told me that because he was talking about the ranking and he was very proud that his team was in the top 10.
And what, how you get ranked, guys, is, is, you know, interacting in that group, finishing your workouts, some of the streaks that you create. And it's a really neat feature in the app. And if you're not, if you're not in the app, use the code 10DWAYNE15 and you get yourself 50% off.
[00:08:32] Speaker A: I appreciate you throwing me the bone, Brad. Brad saw I stabbed him last month.
Yes. Please spread the word. Dwayne 10. Dwayne 15. Last month was a bad month for me. So y'.
[00:08:45] Speaker B: All.
Yeah. But, you know, a great, just a, just an added great feature to our app. And, and you know, like I said, looking at, you know, these people compete to be on the top of that accountability chart, but it really comes back to, you know, just empowering each other, lifting each other, each other up in those dark times. And everybody needs it. You need it, I need it, my wife needs it. Everybody needs it from time to time.
[00:09:10] Speaker A: No, absolutely. And that. I'm glad you brought it a point that we need it. I mean, we're here, we're talking to you, but there are times, you know, and I think we've, we've shared different stories. There are times where we need that. You know, sometimes you don't even know you need it until you hear it. He was like, I needed that. Like, I didn't even know, you know, you just kind of white knuckling it and just going along. And then somebody Sends you a message or you get a call and it was like, man, that I needed that boost, man. So, you know, it, we're, we're not, we're not speaking from a place of, you know, we're always on it, you know, we, we also need that same kind of encouragement.
So send us, encourage. You know how you can encourage us share this podcast, tell us how much you enjoy it.
That is mega encouraging. So, but no, I, I, like I said it, the accountability thing, you know, I caught on to that early on and, and it has been life changing. You know, it has changed the course of my whole life.
It has changed, you know, a lot of people lives. You know, I, I can think of countless people that I've, you know, been in accountability groups with, created these accountability groups and, you know, made impact and it's just amazing, you know, when we're able to come together, you know, at a time where the world is so, you know, polarized and it's one side or the other, you know, coming together at a commonality of, you know, being healthy, being fit or just, you know, being nice, being kind. No matter, you know, what side you stand on, no matter what your colors are, it don't matter, man, just being able to come together, there's so much strength in that. That. Is, is something that we definitely can't, can't overlook.
[00:10:54] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah, man, this, I'm a pretty open minded person and you know, if somebody says the best color in the world is green and I think it's purple, I, yeah, I could get, you know, if the best animal in the world is a lion and I think it's a tiger and yeah, sure, I could get on board with that, you know, being a lion and I think that's a, that's, that, that's a great call out, you know, just being open minded and finding a commonality with other people. Like, yeah, you may think the best color in the world is blue and I might think it's pink, but like, you know, is that going to change the world if we don't agree upon that little thing? I don't know, like for me it's, I don't get caught up in that and I don't want to get too tangled up in controversy and you know, some of the things that are going on in the world. But I think everybody, you know, in being a fitness and motivational podcast, I think we can find that commonality through movement. And for me, you know, it's, it's all about therapy and connection, you know, and that's what I look at fitness as. Like for me, you know, when I go for a run, that's therapy to my mind. When I'm lifting weights, that's therapy to my body.
And don't look at, you know, a workout or your next walk or your next run or your next hike. Don't look at that as something that will like fix or change your life, but it might change the next 20 minutes, right? And I think we can all break our day down into those incremental final sections where like, okay, I'm having a tough day, I, I need to go for a walk, I need to go for a lift, I need to go for a run and, but with the expectation that that will not fix what you have going on. But it might, it might change something in the next 20 minutes and you harness that good energy.
And when you're in a fitness space, like, especially if you're in a, in a, in a gym, a fitness center, a weight room, and everybody's in that same struggle bus, you know, environment, like you're struggling, but so are they, right? And everybody's struggling together. And that's the commonality, that's the common ground, that's the common denominator with everybody in a fitness center. And that, that's why fitness is so empowering. And it's so hard to ignore the fact that fitness doesn't play a vital role in overall happiness, overall wellness.
And man, I could go on and on about why, you know, it's endorphins, it's, you know, it's blood flow, it's all of these things that tie into, you know, a good mindset and you know, just overall mental well being and emotional well being, physical well being.
So I guess guys, what I'm saying is, you know, get out there, move your body, surround yourself with like minded people. Find, find therapy and movement, find those connections that flow into that therapy. And you know, don't, don't measure every workout, you know, by the calories that you burned or the weight that you lift lifted or the, the amount of time, the amount of, the amount of distance that you ran.
Some, some workouts just aren'.
Battles. It's about overcoming mental battles, emotional battles, things a whole lot deeper than that surface level stuff.
[00:13:51] Speaker A: Yeah, no, I'm that man. Listen, you hit it, man. I'm so glad you brought up first that it's not a solve all. We're not saying it's an automatic.
Everything is, you know, roses and daisies, but it is a, you know, it's a step in the right direction. It's a, you know, getting to the point where you, you know, can make a better or feel better or all of those things. It's a step in the right direction. And I, I, I'm, like I said, I'm glad you brought it up because a lot of times when you're so unstable, then you think fitness can be your quote unquote savior in the situation.
And when, you know, the, the endorphins wear off and everything comes down and you're like, oh, I'm back in my phone. But no, that's, that's the step. Like Brad said, it's moment to moment. Now what do you do next? Go get a, go drink some water, go get a, a meal, a healthier meal. You know, stack on the wins. Oh, one at a time, knocking over stuff.
Glad it was nothing in there but stack on the wins one at a time, man. And that in itself will, will give you the momentum you need to just make changes that you didn't even think was possible, man. That the, the biggest, what I love to hear, man, when people have, you know, start a journey and they start doing things and they start making, you know, making some progress and is they were like, man, I didn't even think I could do this, you know, two months ago, three months ago. And that, that's what happens when you, you know, when you stack those wins and, and don't feel like this, the one thing is going to fix everything and then when you slip, don't feel like that one failure is going to crash everything. It's not how it works.
[00:15:30] Speaker B: Right? And, and that's really important, Dwayne, is, you know, once you start to gain momentum and, and you, you, you take that day off or you make an excuse to take that day off, a lot of people will do one of two things. They'll take that day off and they will feel like some sort of remorse and regret, like, oh my gosh, this is going to change my entire life. That one day is not going to change anything as long as you have the discipline to come back the following day.
But here's what happens also is, you know, I, I'm going to make an excuse to take the day off and people never come back, right? They don't have the discipline to come back. So just make sure that you have the discipline to come back. You, you, you absolutely are warranted a day off. I take days off. Duane takes days off.
We need rest days, mental, emotional, physical rest days, and you need those and don't be too hard on yourself.
You know, a lot of people, you know, will get into that. That real nice groove, and they just, like, are grinding and grinding and grinding, and. And they get really discouraged when they take a day off. But those days off are absolutely warranted. And I want to. I want to bring something up. This is kind of related, but kind of not.
Okay. So a couple weeks ago or last week, now that time has passed, I'm trying to, like, do some math here with dates.
[00:16:47] Speaker A: Yeah, it's all good.
Hey, y', all, we're. We're ahead on recordings a couple of weeks. Weeks ago by the time you hear this. So there you go. Yeah, just say how you say it.
[00:16:58] Speaker B: Yeah, well. Well, this. So, you know, just speaking of kindness. And so this. This young lady had. Had walked up to me, and she was an amputee. She had one leg that was.
[00:17:17] Speaker A: No, man. See, I'm. Y' all forgive me. I'm five years old, but this amputee walked up to me, just threw me off, man. I'm sorry.
All right, go ahead.
[00:17:31] Speaker B: She. She came up to me, and. And, you know, she was talking about how, you know, she.
She was very fearful to wear anything but pants. She. She's never wore anything but pants or jeans since. She's had this leg amputated years ago. And, you know, she. She had this. In the back of her mind that. That people would pick on her. People would judge her for having this amputated leg. And I said, I think that's your superpower, right?
Build up in our minds. Like, you know, I'm not fast. I'm not strong. I have an amputated leg. I can't read very well. I can't write very well. And we look at those things, and we. We look at them as flaws, right? Like, I'm not a good writer. I try really hard to be a good writer. I'm a. I'm a published author of four different books. And you don't necessarily need to be great in any of those fields. You don't necessarily, you know, have to have everything figured out to go out there, put yourself out there, make yourself vulnerable.
But I told this young lady, I said, man, start wearing shorts, all right? Show that superpower. And then I said, if somebody starts to judge you, I said, they. They ain't there to rock with you. You got to rock with different people. So your connections are everything. It's that law of four fists that we talk about so often. Like, you become a part of the four people that you Rock with. And I told her, I said, get around people that will lift you up. Get up. Get around people that will empower you. Get around people that accept your superpower, because that amputated leg, that is your superpower. So just going back to that connections piece, and I know that was kind of like, on track and off track at the same time.
Guys, those connections are massive. Get around people that. That support you, lift you up in. In the. In the times of frustration, in the. In the. In the. In the moments of emotional defeat, all those things. Get around people that absolutely.
[00:19:16] Speaker A: No, that. That ties in, man, because it's about getting around the right people and whatever your situation is, you know, because she came to you, she was down, she was sad, you know, about. You know, that. Or not confident. And so, you know, that. That listening to the wrong voices, you know, I think Alicia talked about, you know, listening. Listening to the wrong voices, you know, or the. The wrong. Why, like, you know, why. Why can't I wear. But why don't you, you know, like, changing that. Changing that into a positive. So now that's real good, brother. All right, brother. Anything else you wanted before we start to land this plane?
[00:19:54] Speaker B: No, I. I want to end with this, because this is one of the final things that I. I told her.
You know, a lot of people wait for the. The darkness to disappear, but instead of waiting for the darkness to disappear, start moving towards the light.
[00:20:12] Speaker A: I like it. Till next time. Y.
